33 weeks and I'm in Pain Physically & mentally!

Walking is such a challenge now. I'm not walking anymore, just waddling.

Almost fall on my back yesterday at A&W, over spilled root beer, while so anxiously goin to Chubby to tell him we managed to skill laci the mugs.Muahaha! Padan muka aku!

But I managed to hold my balance and did a split seven instead, which now causes me great pain due to the overstretched.

Then Siti took me to wash my legs and even wanted to help me wipe my leg, while the ignorant person who planted his seed in me, just stood there and watch. You see am I wrong to get upset over this? What is so wrong for him to bend and wipe my feet for me? Salah sangat ke? Jatuh ke his status if he does that? What if I do the same thing to him? He will sure give me the F face and I will definitely be effed.

Then, as usual, walk in front leaving me behind, coz he knows the girls are around to help me walk. I had to asked for the favour from him to hold me, when we reached Pandan. Its sickening! I'm just sick and tired of being ignored and taken for granted.

This is definitely not how I imagined to be treated when pregnant and its definitely gonna be for the last time. Not that I already want it to be the last time before, but this just confirms it even more.

Its embarassing lah that your other half don give a damn about u infront of the friends, in this state.

U know what I'm gonna do. I'm not gonna tell him that I'm giving birth. When the time comes, I'll just get a cab and go to the hospital myself.

Theres more actually lah. But I'll just keep it to myself for now..

32 weeks and Ayah got good news!

Yes he does!

Alhamdullilah, finally our life will be back on track. Now I can finally look forward to Syawal and the birth.

For me its not too good. Da Tao gave me someting new diz week, again, as usual. Sharp pain on the right side on my pelvic bone after I walk a few steps. Makin me more immobile. My legs would just jam and I have to stop walking for a few seconds. I tink his head is already too down there plus the face that he's got a big head too. So that makes it worst. Now I feel like there's a big watermelon stuck in between my legs. Ppl have been givin me the "I'm sorry u're suffering" look. And I've been getting these type of conversations

"Wah when are u due?"
"in 2 mths time"
"wah still so long ah. Looks like u're gonna give birth anytime now"

Nabeiness.

Yes I know its still that long. Can I help that my stomach looks like its bout to burst anytime now? But seriously, I don know how much bigger it can get sia.

So far so good I can fast and only didnt for one day. The day Abang In went out. We were out too much and I cannot tahan lah.

I find it amazing that I can eat dat much during break fast. Then I'll get too heavy and full. Then it'll feel like running a marathon after the prayer.

Finally got my coconut today. Been craving for it since last week sey.

Now waiting for my dengdeng from Manje....Manje come back faster lah!!!

31 weeks and he's fatter!

Yeap yup! He is.

I never tot Durians will really work but it did! yeay!! Last wed I went for the check up and at 30 weeks 2 days, he was already 1654grms. That's slightly above average. At first Dr Heng said, no lah still quite small, when I told her I've been eating Durians. Then when she check the weight, she took back her words. Hmph!

OK but I gotta stop for a while now. Ppl say its heaty and chubby is afraid it'll be another botak baby like Aniq. I tink chubby banyak campur makcik2x Ikea ah.

I'm now 77.9kgs. Nabeis! Gain weight again. Of coz lah.

He is definitely getting much heavier now and I walk like a penguin now and I look like shit. Deprived of Good sleep and good sex!
I feel like my whole body is cracking each time I change my sleeping position. There's only 2 positions now btw and sex is only one. yes, I'm in such a sorry state.

Tomorrow will be the start of Ramadhan and ppl have been telling me not to fast. But if I can, why not kan. So I'll try and lets see how it goes.

Singapore hospitals are so convervative! Only one person is allowed in the labour ward and no video cams! Wa liao. I had expected they will grow out of it, but apparently not!

So its 9 more weeks to go before I can finally hold him in my arms, insyallah. And finally get my good sleep, which I know will only be a week after the birth day. I know coz, I know I will get breast engorgement and how can anyone in the right mind be having a good sleep with that!

Our life is still not back on track yet and its getting nearer and I'm getting more worried. Dear God please help us....

30 weeks, lets fatten him up with durians!

Ok so I missed a week.

Alah, so whos counting anyway. i'm just too plain lazy to write now lah ok?

But at the same time, I want to remember every bits moment of this last pregnancy. Ok I'm confused as usual.

And getting exceptionally heavier and bigger. Tremendously bigger over the couple of weeks. I am always breathless and getting up from the chair after going to the toilet or turning my body to change position at nite is like asking me to run the 2.4km! On top of that, I have to pee almost every 2 hours or so.

Heartburn is getting less, still there, still an irritant at time, but less. So ok lah kan.

Just today, I found out why I was becoming huge all of a sudden is cause of Durian! I have been eating during and one of my colleague told me dat it can make the baby bigger fast. OK so I will eat durians more from today onwards. LOL! Coz doc say my baby is small.

Next wed will be my next check up, so we'll see how much he weights.

Oh and I read somewhere ice cream will also beef up the baby.

So more ice cream and durians for me now please.....life couldnt get any better than this eh..

28 weeks -Oops Sorry I missed the other weeks!

Ya, I missed 3 weeks of updating.

Just don't know wat to write.

This pregnancy have not been a very happy one. I wanna be happy! So that I cant have a healthy baby!

Last 2 weeks was my check up and the Dr said my baby is quite small. I already guess that. My babies have never been big, so it'd be a miracle if this one is big. He have a big head though. Just like Aniq's. Haha!

I've been getting dizzy spells, fm the lack of iron I guess.I'm also down with fever, flu and bad cough the last couple of days.

And I tink my tummy is getting smaller ley. Everyone else said so also. It's kinda worrying me. It's not as big as it's supposed to be. I'm in my 7th mth now, but my tummy is small like 5mths, or rather it had stopped growing the last 2 mths. Weird. But baby is still growing and active. Ok never mind I'll google up later.

I gained another 3 kgs. Damn it. This time I know its all goin to me and not the baby.

25 weeks - Braxton Hick, Swelling, Breathless

Yes, that is all that I am feeling now.

The contractions are getting more frequent now. Hope it's nothing bad. Well no bleeding so far, so should be good lah.

I know I've been too active, as always. Yes, I still ride the bike the work. Muaahahah! But I cant walk far! The bloody bus stop is so far from my work place and cab rides are so bloody expensive!

Eh I still ride the bike up to my last months before, even to JB. So what is the short distance from home to work.

But this pregnancy is different abit lah. I feel so heavy now and it's only the 6th mth! I cant walk far, else I'll get the ligament pain. My feet and hands are starting to swell already. Never had any swelling for the last preggys.

Age is really catching up with me I guess. So I'm glad I'm doing this now. Imagine if I only do it in the next few years. It will be worst! It will be no fun being pregnant.

Anyway, had a talk with him the next day after my post. I almost didnt say anyting to him dat day. The sight of him drives me crazy and I kept on crying.

He went to work that nite and msned me and asked me wats wrong. I was suprised by his reply. HE ACTUALLY APOLOGIZE! Unbelievable! U know that night I almost wanted to book a ticket to Perth, before we msned of coz.

So now, he holds me again, like he use to. He waits for me.

Btw the above is a pic of me 25 weeks, being prego and vain. Muahahah!

24 Weeks - Unappreciated

I really dont know wats wrong with me recently. But today I'm feeling my worst. Was I being too sensitive?

Yesterday, we were at skatepark. It was raining. My slippers were slippery. He didnt even bother to look back, as usual. He walk right infront. Lucky I have my girls to help me walk. Was just holding me to keep my balance too much to ask? If the girls were not there, would he hold my hand then?

Throughout the 6 months, I really dont feel the love and concern I use to get before. Maybe I'm too fat and ugly now dat I am an embarrasment to him?

I'm feeling unappeciated. Invinsible to him at times.

I cried today. Should I? As hard as I try to hold the tears, it came down profusely.

He asked me this morning, wats wrong. I said nothing. Of coz i had to say nothing. Becoz saying wat I actually feel would lead to a big argument, which will make things worst! I'll end up crying more and it's no good for my da tao. But keeping all this aint making it any better, does it?

How heartless can someone be? He is a human who loved me before, protected me. But now I feel like I'm all alone in this. I know I have manje, who will be there within a call. So I'm glad I have this baby sis of mine.

But it shuld be him, shuldnt it? Why doesnt he want to? Why isnt he? Why?

Why the people who shuld be happy, protecting me, be here for me isnt here??

WHY ARE YOU ALL SO FUCKING HEARTLESS!!!>?????

I HATE YOU!